Writing

I don't know why, but I always hesitate talking about my writing. I don't know of other writers/authors have this problem. Part of it is the absolute fear that all the work is for nothing and the work is complete crap. 

But at the same time it's hard to contain my excitement. Plus there is the need for some validation. Even if it's just on a paragraph of sentence. But that leads to questions. Questions lead to them wanting to read your work and than that rolls back to that absolute fear. 

The last couple of days I feel like I have fallen down the rabbit hole with my writing. I go back and reread a few pages to get back into the mindset and it's like I spiral down into it. But is it really that I have created my characters and world so well or is it that they are in my mind so well and I just haven't transferred then to paper well enough. 

The more I delve into this second story, the more I understand what other authors mean about fear.

It is real. 

This and That

It's been over a year since I have posted anything. 

Stuff happened over the course that year. Finally got to go home to Texas after 7 years. In a way it felt that long and in away it didn't feel it. It was great to see my family and all the things I missed, especially the beach and the food. We only had a week and it wasn't nearly enough. It was a crazy whirlwind trip. And as much as I really would like to go back this year, I HATE to fly. 

I read 55 books last year. Wish it had been more but both jobs have kept me so busy. 

I rejoined Weight Watcher last year and I don't know why I just can't keep up with it. I will do really good for a couple of weeks and lose weight and then any little thing that disturbs my pattern REALLY disturbs it. No little stumble, I may as we'll have fallen off a cliff. 

I have managed to keep off the original 10 pounds I lost but that's just a 1/10 of what I want to loose. I have the worst willpower. Some of my friends are in the midst of their own weight loss quests and they are doing so well and I feel like a failure sometimes. 

Perhaps I just need a different perspective on things. I don't know. My husband says he wants to lose weight but he just won't commit. I have just about cut all sodas from my diet. Only drink it if it's the only thing available. I don't know what to do. 

I've been writing a lot in the last year. I basically finished an entire novel. I have yet to type it out completely but it's all there. I'm working on 2 other ones, one of which is a sequel. I haven't decided when I want to send it to an agent yet. It needs reworked some and has to be bled. And by bled I mean sent to someone who will read it and tell me what parts of it are complete shit and need fixed. It's going to be painful and expensive but most good things are. 

On Twitter I follow many authors and try to take in as much advise as I can. Ultimately, it terrifies me but from everything I've read, that's the norm. 

I guess that's about as up to date it gets. I will strive to be more proactive in updating.